4/5/10--Day 6--Orientation

Hello!

I will be posting updates from mostly my perspective. I'm not sure if Jeff will get into this blogging thing or not. I will let him make that decision. For me, its cathartic to write about my experience, so blogging seems the obvious choice and kills two birds with one stone: I get to let it all out in one place and you get to read or not read as much about Jaxson and our experiences as you would like. I hope this is as helpful to all of you as will be to me.

I will do my best to update about all the ups and downs I think are relevant and will include as many pictures as I can. My writing style is pretty straight forward. I'll keep things mostly short and sweet and simple because I don't have time with my busy pumping schedule to elaborate with colorful sentences. So, I'm going to get started with a somewhat chronological explanation of what has taken place over the past month.

Beginning on March 14th, on the first day of week 24 of Jaxson's gestational age, I woke up around 3 or 4 in the morning for my regular bathroom break. When I went back to bed, I felt some water leakage that I could tell was not coming from the usual place (I don't know how else to put it without being too detailed). This continued to happen for the next 3 or 4 hours. Around 7am I called my Dr.'s office to have her paged.

When she called back, she told me that I should get to the emergency room at St. David's (where I would be delivering). When I got there, they got me straight up to the Labor and Delivery (L&D) Unit and started me immediately on IV fluids, a catheter, baby heart rate monitor, Magnesium Sulfate (to stop any contractions) in my IV, and contraction monitor. The nurse (Lea) did an exam to check to see if I was dilated and told me that from what she could tell, I had a ruptured amniotic sac, but that she would test the fluid to find out for sure.

When she came back, she sat on my bed near my knees, put her hand on my leg gently, and said "I have some news you are not going to like. You are ruptured, and you are not going home for 10 weeks, at least. The good news is that you are NOT dilated and you are not having any contractions." Right about then, the Magnesium Sulfate hit me (it made my heart rate increase and made my head hot) and I almost lost my mind. I was very scared having never been in a hospital for anything, ever. It felt like a terrible nightmare. They gave me two rounds of steroid shots (to help Jaxson's lungs develop more quickly).

I was given Ambien that night so I could sleep. The next day, Dr. Ridgeway (a high risk pregnancy Dr.) from Texas Perinatal came over to do an ultrasound on the baby. He looked really well and I had plenty of amniotic fluid (more than 7 cm. They worry if its less than 5 cm). He was 1 lb 12 oz, larger than average for his age (average was about 1 lb) Thank God I didn't go into labor at 24 weeks. If I had, we would have been on an even harder path the the one we are currently on.

I would like to add that Mike (Jeff's brother) was my very first visitor and brought me lots of books to read (Thanks Mike!!).

They decided to move me to a regular room in the ante/postpartum unit. The room was nice, like a dorm room. The nurses brought me as much iced water as I wanted and were all very nice and seemed surprised to find a person in their care who was in a good mood, and smiled and spoke to them like human beings. Many of them commented on this. It was surprising to me to realize that so many people they were treating were just not happy people?? Weird. Anyway, I settled in for the long-haul. Two and a half months was not going to be easy for me in one room. However, I had a great view of a gorgeous courtyard and could sit in the window on a daybed and watch spring come to life.

It wasn't so bad, I thought. My parents had come into town to help out Jeff with the house, Jessica was already bringing me tons of creature comforts and my crazy girlfriends Ann, Ashli, Ronda and Farrell had visited..and I decided that the only thing I could do to keep myself from going insane was to have a positive attitude about it and remember every day that I was doing this for my baby. Of course, that made it all worth it.

I would need to stay pregnant for as long as possible up to 34 weeks at which point they would either do a C-Section or induce labor because after 34 weeks, the baby is basically just fattening up anyway and is developed enough to live outside the womb.

So, a couple of weeks went by. Had lots of visitors, good food, watched TV, played Words with Friends (saved me, thanks Ronda!), talked on the phone, made friends with the cleaning ladies, the lunch ladies, and all of my nurses. I missed my cat and I missed Jeff, even though he would come about every other day, it's not the same as spending alone time at home. The L&D nurses would come by every day to monitor Jaxson's heart rate and check for contractions. His heartbeat was always strong and steady, about 140 bpms.

On Saturday, March 27th, they were back for the usual daily monitoring. I had had some light lower back pain and very mild cramps...which I didn't think anything about. Towards the end of the monitoring session, the nurse was reading to paper and noticed I was having some light contractions. So they took me over to L&D on Sunday to hook me back up to everything. I went through the whole thing again...IV, Magnesium Sulfate, they did an epidural. The contractions faded, so they sent me back to my room on Sunday.

On Monday, I was back in L&D with stronger contractions and I dilated to 3-4 cm. I went back on the epidural, IV, all that stuff. I stayed there all day Tuesday, went to sleep that night and woke up at 4 am to my nurse, Halley, saying she wanted to check to see how far I was dilated. She said 10 cm!!!! I thought I was dreaming. My mom was asleep in the room with me and Jeff was asleep in my other room. I woke up my Mom and said "the baby's coming, 10 cm, you better call Dad" (who was asleep at my house). I called Jeff and told him to haul ass over to my L&D room.

By this time, my doctor, Dr. Eng was already in the foot of my bed, with her table full of torture devices, the NICU folks were marching in (about 8 of them)....It was crowded! Jeff walked in the room right as we were joking about him missing the birth. Right when he walked in, my Dr. told me to assume the position and start pushing. With my Mom and Jeff to my left and my nurse on the right, I pushed about 10 times and suddenly he was here. Jeff had to sit down at one point, I looked to my left and my Mom was patting him on the shoulder asking him if he was alright. He said he got a little queezy.

Dr. Eng handed him to one of the NICU folks, they showed him to me for literally a second and went to work on him immediately. I had to deliver everything else while I watched him the whole time....what I could see of him, which was a hand, shoulder and part of his leg sometimes. He was moving. He didn't really make a sound, which they warned about ahead of time. I was still in shock. It all happened really fast. His official time of birth was on 10/31/10 at 4:33am. He weighed 2 lbs. 5 oz. and was 13.4 inches long.

It was both the most wonderful and the scariest moment of my life. I knew what this birth meant. It meant months in the NICU, months of worrying and crying and months of not knowing if my baby will survive, be in pain, suffer, have permanent health problems on top of every other worry that any mother goes through when they give birth. He has apnea (forgets to breath sometimes) because his little brain is not developed enough yet...so they have him on a vent, but he's working all the time to do it himself. All of the testing they are doing, I'm not even completely oriented about it all yet, has come back NORMAL so far. He's taking food well, which is hopeful for his little digestive system. The brain ultrasound was normal. We have received nothing but good news so far. The Dr.'s are very impressed with his progress.

This birth also meant, however, that I have a son, and his name is Jaxson William Segura Saurenmann. He is loved by more people than I can begin to count. He has a huge tribe of people all over the country and the world who are praying for him and sending him positive energy. He has two sets of wonderful Grandparents (Bill and Kathy and Jo and Randall) who will spoil him rotten. He has an Uncle named Mike. He has two parents who love each other and who love him more than anything and who would do ANYTHING to have him be safe, healthy, happy, smart, and strong. He has blond hair, perfect hands, feet and nails. His lips are beautiful and perfect and he's got broad shoulders and full on looks like a boy. He has a beautiful room to come home to. His Daddy is planting a tree in his honor in the back yard. He has a friend named Hollis who can't wait to show him the ropes. He has lots of friends already. He also has a wonderful team of people who save lives every day and just consider it their jobs.

He has everything to live for. I pray that somehow, deep down in there, someplace, that he knows this somehow.

I'm a changed person. My life is Jaxson now and I'll be holding my breath until I can bring him home. He's wiggly and active, has been the whole time, even in the womb. He blows bubbles with his spit.

I had to come home Friday without him...so hard, but he is in the best place he can be in Texas. This NICU is TOPS! They have definitely made us feel secure in the care he's getting. He is NEVER left alone. His nurses are amazing women..loving, kind, and know their business.

I'm going to post some pictures....as soon as I figure out how to!

I want to thank you all for they love and support you've give us. It's truly overwhelming to feel that kind of love on such a massive scale.

Much Love Right Back at Ya!!! xoxooxxx

Sheree