Moving on up..

I got to the NICU at about 1:45 today to see Jaxson for a few minutes before I went to the "parent university" class at 2pm. He was still on CPAP. His nurse said he had a couple of A's and B's last night, and a couple this morning. His heart rate had been elevated a bit today, so they hadn't switched him to the nasal cannula. I was a little disappointed, but understood. His doctor came by and said he was still going to switch him over and that they had a busy morning admitting some sick babies. He gave the nurse and respiratory therapist the okay to switch Jaxson at 2pm.

At 3pm when the class let out, I hauled ass back to Jaxson's side to see what he looks like. I took some pictures of him....he was starring at his little music box toy they added to his bed yesterday. He's so precious. There is tape on his cheeks holding the tube on, so his cheeks are getting squished up against his nose, but he's got to be a ton more comfortable without those heavy CPAP tubes!!! It's a gift to be able to see his whole face all together instead of only parts of it now and then....like a jigsaw puzzle in my head that I have to imagine. Most importantly, he seemed pretty comfortable. He was calm, showing no signs of stress, but it began to get a little noisy in there...bells and alarms were going off, nurses were talking loudly. He started getting fussy, so I used some calming techniques I learned in class. I covered his eyes and put his pacifier in his mouth with my pinky inside the nipple. He sucked on it until he fell asleep.

One sensory stimulation was enough for him today. The noise in there is pretty ridiculous sometimes, as I mentioned yesterday. In class the speech therapist explained that babies get really stressed out when there are lots of sensory stimuli happening at once like bright lights and alarms together can be overwhelming for their little brains. So, it's best , for example, not to talk to the baby and rub his head at the same time. Or, have his eyes uncovered while changing his diaper. Preemies can't handle being rocked either. It makes them dizzy and they can stay dizzy for about 30 minutes. Blocking one of the stimuli while doing the other is better. So, when all the bells were going off, I covered his eyes and gave him a self-soothing tool (the paci). It's simple, but counterintuitive to what we all know term babies can handle.

I learned all the different signals babies give you when they are stressed like holding the hands in the stop position, grimacing, chin tugging, arching the back, hiccupping, gagging and grunting, desat, change in breathing, increased heart rate, flailing arms and legs, etc. All of these Jaxson has done at some point alone or in unison.

It's just best, for now..until he reaches 40+ weeks gestational age to choose once stimuli at a time and go with it. Also, because we are trying to recreate the womb environment, the baby is best swaddled tightly with arms bent and hands near the face (inside the swaddle), legs tucked up and flexed with something against all sides of him to create boundaries. At this point in development, if Jaxson were still in the womb, he would be running out of room and bumping, kicking or punching with no room. This creates muscle tone because the womb creates resistance! So, we are just trying to get his little muscles to develop tone by creating that same scenario in the NICU.

This stuff is fascinating to me. I read the whole packet last night. A lot of it is common sense, but only if you think about it. I knew NOTHING about babies much less premature babies before all of this, so, I'm cutting myself some slack. I found myself thinking, wow, you should have know that instictually. BUT, then, I just kinda got pissed for not being given this information EARLIER!!! I've been reading lots of stuff online about preemies, but have still wondered why, for example, they wrap Jaxson up so tightly. I GET IT NOW! It's body building for babies!

Anyway, I know now. And the stuff I did to help him calm worked and that made me feel empowered and like a real mother.

WIN.

Jeff was coming to visit after work, so I hung around until he got there. While waiting for him, I watched Jaxson sleep. He had some heart rate dips and a couple of tiny brady's, but he mostly was grunting and acting like he was making poo. He also got the hiccups. I wondered if that was because it was so damn noisy in there (stress cue) or because of his indigestion or something. They were feeding him at the time after all. ??? Who knows. I just tried to cover up his ears and eyes to muffle the sounds. His nurse came by and said they would be moving him to Bay 6. This is a step up, or down, depending on how you look at it. It's a step up in that it's a smaller bay that takes babies who need LESS care. It's a good thing. Even if Jaxson can't handle the cannula, they will just put him back on CPAP and leave him in Bay 6. He's not a "sick" baby and they are making room for sick babies in bays 1, 2, and 3....In a way it's like him moving from preschool to kindergarten as far as care goes.

My baby is not sick, he's just immature. Once he matures, he's going to be fine. Thank you God. Seriously. I spoke with a mother whose baby girl has been in there since February because she was born spontaneously and her intestines were on the outside of her body!! The baby had already had 3 surgeries and is still in the NICU. She is a very sick little baby. My baby just needs some time to grow up a little. I have NOTHING to feel sorry for myself about. I just have to wait a little longer for my baby to come home.

One of the nurses told me that they are having a NICU reunion in October and that it's usually really fun and that she wants to see us there. I thought to myself, wow, in October, my kid will have been home for a few months already. That kind of put things into perspective.

I hadn't intended on writing this much today, but oh well...It turned out to be a bigger day than I thought. I just called and spoke with his nurse. She said the move went fine, she bathed him and he's sleeping. She said he did really well with the bath, no fussing. She said that all they nurses in bay 6 came by to see him and they all think he's super cute! Ha!

LOVE!!

Sheree